SHOULDN’T EVERYONE THINK, FEEL, ACT, AND REACT LIKE ME? MAYBE NOT!
In my previous post I shared that it is possible to move from a stuck and unrewarding relationship to a connected and respectful relationship.
I told you about the nine personalities have three categories: Heart/Emotion, Head/Mind, Body/Instinct.
I think you are already beginning to realize that the nine types operate very differently in the world and from their own perspective. Did you pick your category?
The three major mistakes we make in relationships are: • You believe everyone should think, feel, act, and react the same way you do. In couple dynamics, most people even believe if you did this, then that is loving them! • Your patterns are natural to you so you find it difficult that others don’t understand you • You are unaware of your unconscious personality patterns that may be sabotaging you
Did you know that 2/3 of what couples fight about is personality perspective differences and are irreconcilable...unless you understand your personality couple dynamics? This is the same for all relationships.
We are way more comfortable when we feel the sameness with others. Just think though, what a boring world that would be if there was only one note, one color, one fabric, one type of car.
And statistics show that opposites attract. Why do you think that is? You are looking for someone who has different qualities than you do.
The challenge is that each personality type focuses their attention intently on different values: 1-Perfecters: Follow their rules and to be right 2-Supporters-Life is all about relationships and close connections 3-Achievers-Success and acknowledgement gets you rewards 4-Expressers-The world is richer and juicier expressing deep emotions 5-Contemplators-Living a more logical and simplistic life 6-Questioner-Creating safety and security 7-Optimister-Fun, adventure, spontaneity 8-Asserter-Taking charge to protect and take action 9-Peace Seeker-Avoid conflict at all cost to create harmony
Each of these also has a challenging side when you are in relationship with them whether personally or professionally. And this is where the friction comes in.
What each of us is looking for in our relationships is to be acknowledged for the gifts we bring to the relationship and to be appreciated for our value.
What really feels great is to be able to reduce your stress, get along with everyone much better, and resolve conflict so much easier!
Even if you have a pretty good relationship, aren't there are times when you feel….”Grrrr why do they have to be like that?”
Having an “Operator’s Manual” to Getting Loved and Appreciated makes life so much simpler…and quite frankly at lot more interesting and juicier!
Eileen Head/The Relationship Whisperer
P.S Tomorrow’s post I will tell you about the program and Will This Program Work For You